Does having a diagnosis help?

When I started to study neurodiversity in order to become a specialist trainer I believed I was neurotypical. I assumed that what went on in my head was the same for everyone else, (who knew that other people can’t hear counting, music, several conversations and personal thinking all at the same time)!

Throughout my life I’ve had things that challenge me but I didn’t realise that was because I had a brain that worked differently.

My school reports regularly said” we know she has the capability , but she struggles to concentrate”. College and university were not for me, not more book work I wanted out of the classroom. I couldn’t bare the idea of an office job, sitting at a desk all day sounded like torture so I went into sales as I could be out and about visiting, canvasing and meeting different people. I was great at starting conversations and relationships but struggled with long slow negotiations that would lose my interest so I focused on new business and I excelled at it.

More recently when I told my daughters that I thought I might be an ADHDer they laughed and said Mom, you’ve only got to look at your search history to see that! (there is a game in the family, guess what mom’s looking at on her lap top, as it could be anything from why is a slug trail shiny to what makes the best dance shoes!).

So I did what I always do and bought some books on the subject and yes, they are describing my experience of being alive very accurately.

My husband has a term to describe my behaviour, he calls it ‘butterflying’, where I skip from task to task suddenly remembering the washing I’d started to sort then getting drawn into repotting the plant I just passed and leaving both mid task to feed the dog who was patiently waiting for his breakfast several hours into the day. This can go on all day when I can be extremely busy but achieve and complete absolutely nothing!

But do I need a diagnosis?

With a 2-10 year waiting list in some areas or a cost of several thousand pounds if I go private, what difference will it make? I’ve managed ok so far, right?

In my experience ADHD is like a computer with too many tabs open that can’t prioritise where to focus the available bandwidth. It doesn’t know what to prioritise so tries to do everything first. There are medications that can help by waking up the part of my brain that deals with motivation, focus and inhibitory control and I would need a diagnosis to get that. I’m currently experimenting with other options such as meditation, mindfulness, diet and cold water dips. They do seem to be helping but as yet I’m not sure which ones have the biggest impact.

Watch this space !

Having said that, I have decided to join the waiting list for a diagnosis, (about 2 years for me). I’m hopeful that there will be other options by the time I get there.

Becoming aware of my neurotype has however, helped me to put systems in place to help manage the challenges of day to day life.

I use Alexa and Siri a lot, set alarms to remind me for tasks and also to remind me to eat (easy to forget when I’m hyper focused). For me all systems must be audible and very visible. I have object impermanence which means if I can’t see it then it’s gone from my brain (see blog on object impermanence).

Things to think about:

• The law does not require a person to have a diagnosis for a neurodivergent “condition” for them to be covered by the protected characteristic of ‘Disability’. Anyone can ask for reasonable adjustments if the difference can be observed and is causing a person problem at work.
• If you feel that having a diagnosis somehow validates you then there’s no reason not to ask your GP to add you to the list if you believe it will help you think more positively about your processing differences.
• Most of the relevant charities have a test or diagnostic tool on their web sites. This doesn’t give you a diagnosis but helps you see if you’re a likely candidate for that neurotype. Filling this in can help with your awareness of that neurotype, and take it with you when you go to see your GP too.

My dream is that one day in the future we will let go of all the labels and the diagnosis will be irrelevant, and people will all accept that no two brains are the same.